Break the Habit A step by step guide on how to do it. FALL 2009

Break the Habit


BY SHANNON LEONARD-BOONE
FALL 2009

Do you find it difficult to let go of the vices that keep interfering with your quality of life? See if you fit into one of these categories.

Bad habits are sinister and stealthy, creeping up on you gradually, manipulating your emotions until you succumb to their temptations.

How often have you eagerly bitten into that juicy cheeseburger or flaky pastry only to remember midway through it that pledge you made to yourself to eat healthier? You quickly shrug it off thinking, “Oh well, it’s too late now. May as well finish it off and try again later.”

Even remaining unaware of bad habits can be a bad habit, as they continue to sap your energy, health, or quality of life.

Some local mental health experts were asked to provide advice on combating some common bad habits and to help people recognize what emotional triggers can bring on the temptation so they can be overcome.

You may recognize some bad habits of your own in the following foibles of our fictional characters.

Rita the Reckless Rusher becomes Rita the Relaxed

The Problem: Rita the Rusher has a low tolerance for waiting. She loses her temper when standing in a long line at the grocery store checkout, and she’s a speed demon on the road.

The Trigger: Peggy Hoffman, a licensed clinical social worker and licensed marriage and family therapist with Creating Changes Counseling, says these behaviors are often seen in someone who’s feeling overwhelmed, with too many things to do and not enough time or energy to do them all.

“Maybe she’s had someone ask her to do something, and it’s just one more thing that’s on her plate because she’s overextended herself,” Hoffman said.

She says when a person feels so upset and harried over time, a pattern can grow in which the person’s reactions to these otherwise common situations become overreactions and are disproportionate to the situation.

The Solution: Hoffman said someone with an impatience/temper issue like Rita’s should step back and recognize these undesirable symptoms, look at what’s really happening, and try to put the situation in better perspective.

If someone continually puts herself last and takes on too many responsibilities while helping others, it is okay to decline requests once in a while and pare down one’s schedule, making time instead for relaxing, taking a vacation, spending time on a hobby, or talking their feelings out with a trusted friend or relative, she said.

Dan the Depressed becomes Dan the Delighted

The Problem: Dan has a lack of energy and doesn’t sleep well. He refuses to socialize with friends, preferring instead to spend time at home watching TV.

The Trigger: Hoffman said Dan’s symptoms seem to indicate depression, which can be brought on by a recent loss or major life change, such as a death of a loved one or pet, a job change, or relocation to a different city.

“So he’s kind of withdrawn and is isolating himself and doing all of those depressive type behaviors,” Hoffman said.

The Solution: Hoffman said Dan needs to recognize his depressive symptoms and try to make some lifestyle changes that can benefit his mood and increase his chances to socialize, such as exercising or calling a friend to meet with him. She said men are often less likely than women to ask for help with their depression symptoms, but it’s important for them to recognize them and ask for professional help if needed.

Sally the Smoker becomes Sally the Smiler

The Problem: Sally hadn’t smoked a cigarette for two months until she lost her job. Now she’s returned to her old habit of smoking a pack a day.

The Trigger: Cheryl Ades, a psychotherapist and licensed clinical social worker, says anxiety, stress, unmanageable feelings, feeling out of control, and major life changes can send someone back into their old habit of smoking.

The Solution: Ades said smoking is an oral experience, so chewing gum or even talking about the issues they’re feeling can help satisfy that craving. There are support groups such as Smokers Anonymous one can join, and also healthy habits one can use as a replacement for smoking. “Find something else that’s anxiety relieving such as exercising,” Ades said.

Greta the Gobbler becomes Greta the Graceful

The Problem: Greta eats constantly, even when she’s not hungry.

The Trigger: Mindless eating can be caused by being bored with one’s job or relationship, a life-changing event, or an overall lack of fulfillment in life.

The Solution: Ades said one should “really examine their physical, spiritual, and emotional lives” and find healthier ways of finding fulfillment away from the refrigerator. “Go to a movie, write in a journal, enjoy flavored tea or coffee, call a friend to talk about your feelings,” she adds, “nurture yourself by buying non-food rewards for yourself or engaging in a healthy activity like yoga.”

Sluggish Sue becomes Super Walker Sue

The Problem: Sue can’t stick to a regular exercise routine.

The Trigger: “People give excuses like ‘I’m too tired’ or ‘I’m too busy’ or ‘I don’t have time,’ so they are easily able to talk themselves out of it,” says Kimberly A. Maugans-Smith, clinical social worker, therapist and licensed clinical social worker with East Louisville Counseling.

The Solution: Try setting up a manageable plan of exercise goals and rewards that are written down as a visible reminder on a calendar and strictly adhered to, barring some emergency. This will create a daily expectation of exercising, while forming a healthy habit.

It also helps, she said, to ask a fun friend or relative join you to make yourself accountable and to make exercising a pleasant experience to anticipate.

Remember, it is the habit that is bad, not you. Take small steps to overcome behaviors that are making your life uncomfortable. Keep building on those small steps and soon you will be making better choices for your life.

It’s up to you.